The Heart's Pain
by jadephoenix
Summary: A spin-off, angsty love story (Fushigi Yuugi)


This is a spin- off from a scene in manga 16, so there is definitely spoilers for it and perhaps for manga 17 as well. The thought process that had led me to write this story is quite interesting, but I am not going to say it now. Anyway, this scene always bugs me, fact is, this is the one scene that later leads me on the read Fushigi Yuugi (which because of poor cover design and apparent shoujo content, I am at first not interested in). By the way, be forewarned that you may not quite understand what is happening if you have not seen manga 16 or the corresponding OVA episode. On to the story then, all those who dare

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# The Heart's Pain Part 1 

"What!!! Oh no what what should I do?", Miaka stuttered, she is on the verge of bursting into tears, already Tamahome is in danger and now Tasuki is poisoned. 

"Place place your hand over my heart the poison will have to be sucked out", Tasuki barely whispered in between gasps of pain.

"Oh, so that's it!",, Miaka carefully help Tasuki turn over and peel open his clothes. 

Just as she bends over his wound, a voice rang out in the darkness. 

"Hey, what are you trying to do?" A tall, slender woman with long glossy blue hair approaches them, moving fast but silently. 

"I...", before Miaka can explain her position, the stranger said promptly in a gentle but firm voice, "I see, your friend is poisoned but you must not suck the poison out with your mouth, it will infect the wound. My name is Hiromi, I am a travelling doctor, let me see what I can do." 

Even as Hiromi introduces herself, she kneels down beside Tasuki and starts digging out herbs from a canvas sling bag she carries.

"Chew this, it will help lessen your pain.", saying so, Hiromi stuffs some herbs that greatly resemble grass into Tasuki's mouth. By now, he is in too much pain to argue, so he chewed the bitter herb with a frown but indeed the herb does lessen his pain such that his breathing becomes less laborious. With Miaka's help, she tied bandages above and below Tasuki's wound saying as she does so that it will help stop the poison from spreading. 

"How are you feeling?", Hiromi asks as she withdrew a candle holder with a long white candle in it. 

"", Tasuki grimaces, the pain has subsided to a more manageable level but it is still an exertion for him to talk. 

"We must hurry, the anaesthetic is not working fast enough, you'll just have to bite this.", Hiromi's instructions have quickened considerably as have her actions. She places a tight row of towel in Tasuki's mouth and pauses mulling over how to light the candle for she has no flint with her. 

"Allow me ", Tasuki grins wryly as he reached for his tessen and with a barely whispered Lekka Shinen, he lights the candle. 

Hiromi looks up in surprise but her face turns serious as she pulls out a white bundle which she opens to reveal a gleaming knife. 

"Better put that away and hold his arms, will you, er... looks like I have forgotten to ask for names.", for the first time since Tasuki and Miaka have seen her, she smiles, an action which lightens up her entire countenance and enhances her beauty. 

"My name is Miaka and he is Tasuki.", Miaka said after she recovered from her surprise, the lady is very beautiful but she notices now that there is an immense pain in her eyes but it is hidden so deep within those dark pupils that one can only see the sadness if one cares to observe properly. 

Hiromi's face darkens slightly but the expression quickly pass as she holds the knife over the flame and concentrates on sterilising the knife. 

Miaka shifts her position such that she is holding Tasuki's arms above his head. Tasuki blushes as Miaka peers over at him but he quickly shuts his eyes and hold his breath as the blade touches his wound. 

With precision and a certain trained skilfulness, Hiromi slices out a piece of flesh around the wound and pressed a clean cloth against the fresh wound with one hand while taking a jar out of her bag with another.

Tasuki's chest heaved as he bites hard on the towel and clutches his fists trying hard not to strain too much against Miaka's hold. Opening the jar and taking away the cloth, Hiromi places several dark, squishy looking things onto Tasuki's wound.

"What what are those?", Miaka squirms slightly in digust. Tasuki tries to look at his wound and moves a little as he feels things sucking on his wound. 

"These are leeches, I am using them to suck out the poisoned blood. They are less likely to infect the wound than a human mouth. Don't worry, they will fall off once they are full and they don't have a great appetite." 

"The leeches", Miaka mumbles to herself thoughtfully.

Sure enough, the leeches fall off once they are rounded with blood and Hiromi swabs a salve over the wound before tying a bandage around Tasuki's wound.

"I must go now.", Hiromi stood up suddenly and is gone as soon as she had appeared.

"Matte!", Miaka calls out but Hiromi is no where to be seen.

Just as Miaka helps Tasuki to his feet, Nuriko flew by with his brother waving like a flag behind him. Nuriko soon turns around, recognising his friends. "Why, it's Miaka and Tasuki!" 

Merrily, Nuriko carries the three of them back to his house where the rest of the shichiseishi busied themselves trying to restrain the monster in Tamahome's body. 

"Tamahome ", Miaka reaches for him and Tamahome cries out in pain. (_argh, that horrible screech _O-o)

"Baka, what are you trying to do ", Tasuki berated Miaka as he held her back. 

"The leeches maybe I can suck the monster out from Tamahome's wound."

"What oh, let me do it.", Tasuki looks thoughtful for a moment and then bends over Tamahome who unfortunately still recovering from Miaka's touch jerks convulsively, hitting Tasuki right on his wound. (_BULL-EYE! sigh... sniff_)

"TAMAHOME", Tasuki's voice shook and his eyes turn saucer like in pain and anger.

"You have to rest, Tasuki, you are injured.", quickly Miaka leads Tasuki aside and carries out what she plans to do even with protests from her seishi.

Finally, with the help of Nuriko and his brother, the monster is drawn (suck I mean) out from Tamahome's body and dispatched with a swift stroke from Hotohori's sword.

"Yes!", Tasuki cried triumphantly and everybody has a moment of joy.

"Tasuki, can you burn off the surface of the crystal? Sorry to have to trouble you when you are injured." 

"Sure!", controlling the flame from his tessen carefully, Tasuki burns off the surface of the crystal and the ball within is quickly absorbed by Tamahome. Once again, everybody bathes in joy and reminiscence but it is not to last.

Suddenly, Tasuki turns pale and doubles over. Hotohori who happens to be the nearest to Tasuki, reaches out instinctively to catch him but his hands passes right through. 

"Tasuki!", everybody shouts in surprise as Nuriko leaps forward and catches Tasuki just in time. The "yoku" character on Tasuki's arm blink once, twice before disappearing and Tasuki groans slightly and shifts in Nuriko's arms.

"He is feverish, what's wrong with him?", Nuriko said as he places Tasuki on the ground gently.

"Maybe maybe his wound is infected?", Miaka said shakily as Tamahome comforts her.

"No, it's too early for that."

Just then, Tasuki smirks or more like it, he sneers with his eyes still closed. He stood up slowly, opening his eyes only when he is standing fully. 

"I am Seiryuu seishi, Miboshi.", with that Tasuki looks up with coldness and contempt.

"You are joking, aren't you, Tasuki?" Miaka laughs uncomfortably. 

"And what if I'm not." Tasuki holds his hand up and held it in mid- air. The others heard it even before they seen it. A whirring prayer wheel appears in Tasuki's hand.

To be continued...

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That is all that I can write for now. Actually, I have intended to finish this off at one go but it is three a.m. now and I have to go for erhu lesson tomorrow (hmm, come to think of it, today!), so well Hope you enjoy this, I'll try to put up the rest as soon as possible. Hey look, I am using the Japanese phrases I learnt from reading fushigi yuugi fanfics! By the way, leeches are really used to suck blood from wounds in the past and they are still being used now, though not in the same way. There are substances in their blood that prevents the clotting of blood which seems to help in preventing heart disease. A tip: If a leech ever attaches itself to you, you can't simply pull it off for your skin will go with it, you'll have to burn it off with a small flame (or wait until it is full if you are so generous...)

Matte= wait  
Baka= stupid or something to that effect   
Itai= pain

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# The Heart's Pain Part 2 

I am Seiryuu seishi, Miboshi.

Suddenly, monsters attacked from all directions, closing in upon them in a circle. The shichiseishi surrounded Tamahome and Miaka protectively even as Chichiri set up a shimmering energy shield. Silently, Miboshi slipped out amid the confusion, he has no reason to fight the Suzaku seishi since all the Seiryuu seishi are long dead, since _he _is long dead 

Too long, it had been too long since he last owns a body, especially that of a full grown adult as he is only strong enough to possess those who are weak in the mind. Most of the time only young children are vulnerable, their souls being so traumatised by the experience that they disappear forever and Miboshi will reside in the body until it too wilts. The possessed body will never grow and tends to last only a few years before it becomes uninhabitable whereupon Miboshi will have to look for a new host. 

Walking, much less running, is not an option if Miboshi is to have any respect in the body of a small child. Teleportation and levitation are better choices, not only will he have a height advantage, it will strike all the more deeper into hearts of believers and enemies alike of his god- like or more appropriately demonic power. Which is why he has an urge to take to the air even though he knows he can move faster by running in an adult's body, especially in _this_ body. He suppresses that urge though, he needs to hurry, and there is no time to lose to transportation preferences. 

It had started to rain soon after Miboshi leave the temple, rain pelted down on him through the forest canopy until it is impossible to distinguish sweat from rain, rain from tears. He is both sweating and crying though, that he can be sure. No, it should be Tasuki who is crying, crying for him (Miboshi). Tasuki (soul) is neither asleep nor gone but he is no longer in command of his own body though his emotions are so strong that tears flow freely from his heart and eyes. Crying at the horrifying memories that his former enemy held, which he is forced to watch as it replayed in his mind with maddening clarity.

_A house is being set on fire. His house. Inside the locked house, a woman stood at the window with a baby clutched in one hand, banging at the wooden window bars and pleading for help and mercy. But there is no mercy, no mercy as sticks and hay thrown around the cottage were lit and a red blaze started to consume with a vicious hunger the surrounding wood. This was the view that greeted him when he returned from the market with a toy in one hand for his infant child and food in the other, meat that his family hasn't had in months. The villagers grabbed him as he dashed toward the house, releasing him only when the woman became concealed by the thick black smoke rising from the fire. He had pushed his way through the burning door with his bare hands screaming in anguish. The pain of his heart tearing apart greater than any physical pain possible._

Miboshi stop his run and rested against a tree clutching his side which is bleeding freely as the wound that Tasuki had sustained earlier on tore open in his unaccustomed exertion. The cold rain has somewhat numbed his senses and brought his fever down but the combination of mental and physical pain makes him dizzy. In the distance, he can feel the _Ki_ of the Suzaku seishi, already they had defeated his monsters and are hot on his heels. 

"People can be very powerful when they are united, can't they?", Miboshi said with a mirthless smile and then chuckles when Tasuki (soul) squirms.

_So innocent and yet so full of empathy. So like her. He found her lying on the floor with the baby clutched to her chest after he broke through into the house. Just then, beams weakened by the fire started falling down on them and all hell broke loose_

Alternating black and white spots have started appearing in his vision as he staggers from tree to tree to continue his journey. She is very near now, he can feel. He clutches his hands into tight fists to keep himself from fainting but he has taken no more than another four steps before the world falls from under his feet and he spirals into a black consciousness. 

Chichiri stops for a while to re-establish Tasuki's position, the _Ki_ signal from him is getting nearer but weaker. Nuriko looks on with consternation as Chichiri closes his eyes in concentration, he wants to tell Chichiri to hurry up but he knew Chichiri is drained already after the bout with the parasitic monster in Tamahome's body and Miboshi's monsters. Hotohori scans the surroundings while Nyan Nyan floats high in the air to help search for the possessed seishi. The moonless night and heavy downpour isn't helping at all. Only a very small area can be illuminated with what little light that is provided by Hotohori's holy sword and Nyan Nyan. Everybody has came out for the search after Tamahome and Miaka disappeared back to their world in a sudden glow of red light except for Nuriko's brother who is injured.

"Please, please be alright, Tasuki!"

Chichiri started forward the moment he knows which direction to take. He is perturbed by the fact that Miboshi can possess Tasuki, something is very wrong but he cannot put a finger on it. 

_His heart started racing the moment he opened his eyes to find himself staring at himself. A quick scan around has soon revealed the cause of the unusual situation. Apparently, he had just discovered another power he had as a Seiryuu's seishi. A paroxysm of sobbing overtook him as he crawled out slowly from under bodies of himself and his wife. He became a changed person in every sense of the phrase the day he heard his own childish brawling in the voice of his child echo through the space where his house last stood._

Miboshi is startled awake by his fevered dreams of the past and the close presence of someone. For a moment, he thought he is found by the Suzaku's seishi but he recognises this _Ki. _How can he forget, this the _Ki _signature of his beloved wife.

* * *

# The Heart's Pain Part 3 

"Who are", Hiromi hissed out between clenched teeth, "you?"

She does not believe her power can fail, the fact that the Suzuku seishi with flame- coloured hair can still be staring at her with wide open eyes will only mean that he is overtaken by another entity. Her plot has failed then. Even if she forces out the entity and possesses Tasuki, the rest of the Suzuku seishi will already be on alert. Tenkou- sama will not be pleased. Nevertheless, killing one seishi is better than killing none even if that is not the original plan.

Miboshi is suddenly tongue- tied, he is totally overwhelmed by the clashing feelings he felt, part of which belongs to Tasuki. He is so sad, so frightened, so shocked, and strangely yet, so happy. The day he possessed his own son, a frozen block of ice had replaced the place of his heart in his chest. He had thought himself incapable of feeling but the fact that he is frightened of death when Chiriko killed himself along with him had proved him wrong. Then again he had never thought that he is still capable of joy, true joy. In a voice trembling with emotions that he couldn't remember when he last had, he said tentatively, "Don't you remember, Hiromi, don't you remember me?"

Closing her eyes, Hiromi stood still in the storm as a look of pain passed on her face. The whistling of the wind grow in volume and the rain fall with ever bigger droplets and intensity as if all the souls in forest are wailing out their own tragedy. 

_Fire, smoke, fear. Flames leaping at her feet, smoke stinging her eyes and choking her breath, she had pleaded, begged for mercy but there is none. Some of the villagers turn and walked away sadly, they are worst than those who stay and watch with cold tight grins, their conscience hurt and yet they had not tried to help but only turn to escape the scene. She had never thought that the villagers are capable of harm, only those cruel bandits, those unfeeling enemy soldiers can kill women and children without batting an eyelid, not the villagers who smile and chat with her, who sell her food and said her child is cute. She never know how fear can twist the minds of people, never know how easy it is for people to give themselves excuses for massacre. There is hatred when she loses the last grip on her consciousness but only because they harmed her child, mostly there is confusion. Why, why, why_

"Why, why have you allowed them to kill me and our child, why? WHY? What had you done to cause them to do this to us? WHAT HAD YOU DONE!" Hiromi spat out angrily, her fury is spectacular even in the midst of the crashing storm, this is the man she had loved all her life, the man she had entrusted her life to and the same man who had betrayed it.

Miboshi remembers, he knows why. It is his weakness that he allowed himself to be used. When they threatened to make life difficult for his family, he had foolishly agreed to summon monsters for them to frighten the villagers. "Just to frighten them so that they will agree to sell the land, we'll give you commission if you do it well, if you chose not to comply, do not blame us for being nasty.", they had coerced.

Yes, they had given him money but just when he thought all is once peaceful and blissful again, he was betrayed. They had turned the wrath of the villagers upon his family when their dirty trick was found out. Of course, he repaid the villainous merchants later, blood for blood, but his anger had never creased but burned more fiercely than the fire of hell. It is too painful and death is bliss in contrast, and so his heart died. But the litte Suzuku seishi's courage has chipped his frozen heart and as he die physically, his heart had start to revive. Somewhere in the recesses of Chiriko's mind, he had listened in shocked silence the exchange between the Suzuku's shichiseishi and remembered the pain and the guilt and most of all, love.

"I am sorry, no words can express my remorse. I am sorry Hiromi, I am so sorry please forgive me. I beg for your forgiveness. I would have joined you in death but our son I thought I could save him I love you, Hiromi. Please come back to me." Miboshi had practically crawled to the feet of his wife, tears streaming down the sides of his face, he is too dizzy to walk as pain assailed him both physically and mentally.

"I, I don't, don't come near me." Her beloved is in front of her saying what she had wanted to hear, what she had hope to be true, he had not betrayed her love but it is too late now, too late.

Miboshi closed his eyes and appeared saddened by her oscillating behaviour and expressions, with a half smile, he said lovingly, "I have come to save you, my love. Come with me."

Miboshi stands up wavering and then stretches out his open palm to his wife. Hiromi looks at him with both fear and hope in her eyes and then steps back saying with resignation, "Go, go before I hurt you. I am nolonger in control ofmyself."

"Take my hand, Hiromi. I can't lose you again. I can't" Miboshi pleaded and stumble towards Hiromi who is now shivering uncontrollably.

"No, don't come near me!" Hiromi swings her arm out, slapping Miboshi's hand away but that slight contact had been electrifying.

Tears clouded her eyes and yet strangely she can now see even clearer than before. A golden shining figure smiles down at her, reaching out for her hand. A face that she haven't seen for a long time, a face that to she longs for look at for eternity. "I love you"

"I love you too." With that, Hiromi took the hand of the golden figure.

"Tasuki!" Chichiri shouts in fear as Tasuki collapsed. The woman in front of Tasuki slowly disintegrated into swirling sparks of light but like a phoenix rising from the ashes, she appeared once again, light and ethereal, her blue hair flowing around her like a wedding veil. Holding her hand, never once letting go was a handsome man as translucent and luminous as her.

The Suzuku seishi dashes towards their fallen companion and Chichiri gather up Tasuki in his arms. Slowly, Tasuki's eyelids fluttered open and he turns just in time to see two shimmering figures disappearing into the dark night hand in hand. 

"Tasuki, are you alright?", Chichiri inquired worriedly as he tried to lift him up but Nuriko took over and easily carried Tasuki as if he weighs less than a baby.

"Ithurts."

"Let's get back to the temp..." Nuriko stops when he realizes Tasuki wasn't referring to his injury.

"Love hurts. Whydoes it hurt somuch?"

"You will understand in time, Tasuki."

And someone whispered into the hollowing storm, "Love is the thing that gives meaning to life. So all our joys and pains are centred around it." 

The End.

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It had been so long...sigh. When I first started writing this, I knew next to nothing about the Japanese language and now I can already read both hiragana and katakana and will soon be proceeding on to kanji. Time passes real fast and so we must do what we want to do and say what we want to say before opportunity too slips away

Jade Phoenix  
[http://phoenix.fictioncity.com][1]

   [1]: http://phoenix.fictioncity.com



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